Aesthetic Values

Los Angeles, California

Recently, while having an HVAC system installed on my roof, I was wasting time catching up on notifications and emails with the goal of deleting a lot of unnecessary storage from that Cloud. During this process, I ran across an article on Wired, entitled Tips and Tools to Help You Stick to Your Goals. And, included in the article was a link to a Psychology Today Values Clarification Quiz designed to help identify what we each want to honor this year in order to set top three goals. This all seems a little lofty to someone who is retired, and many of the questions in the long quiz were employment-related. Still, I answered all in spite of applying a lot of the work-related questions to my current work at home as a retiree.

You have to pay to get a detailed report. Had they known me, they wouldn't even have suggested that. But they did offer a free summary report, based on my answers. The results of the test were said to remind or educate me as to what values are most important. Interesting. It said that they could also be utilized for me to make changes in my life in order to help me become more content. This if, for some reason, I have been living in a way inconsistent with my top values, which could be a disturbing revelation, I suppose.

According to the results of the quiz, my top core value turned out to be Aesthetic: Those who are motivated by these values wish to surround themselves with beauty. Seems somewhat true of me, although my sense of beauty is probably not universal. While I have 'collected' islands my entire life and covet being near the ocean, if you drop me in a forrest or desert, which some find beautiful, I will feel confined, stifled and edgy. I find many cities beautiful, and the nighttime view of a skyline from a top story hotel room or lounge breathtaking. The summary goes on to say: They have a creative, unusual way of thinking and want the environment they surround themselves with to be reflective of that. Without creative outlets, they feel extremely stifled. My top three interests, as delineated at the very beginning of my blog are: Cooking, dancing and writing. The test results further says that when aesthetic people are placed in an unattractive, dreary environment, it could have a very negative effect on them. Ok, this one really hit. Dump me in a subpar home rental or hotel, the former with cheap appliances and/or inferior linens, and it will honestly ruin my entire trip. There is little more that is depressing to me than staying in a crappy motel or shabby home rental. I will not be happy for the entire stay.

The two bedrooms I had when I was growing up were quirky. As a teenager, my bedroom had hardwood floors and paneled walls with red 'flocked' wallpaper above, framed old west 'wanted' posters, and an antique red velvet upholstered platform rocking chair which had once belonged to my great-grandmother. My twin bed nestled under windows in the corner of the room had a leopard-print, fleece bedspread. My furniture, consisting of a desk, record cabinet and dresser, was dark wood with spindles, and at the time its style was called spanish. All-in-all it looked like a teenager's idea of a Western saloon, conceptualized after a family trip to Jackson Hole, Wyoming which included a night of entertainment at the Pink Garter Saloon. My sister called my style "early whorehouse." And, with a red light fixture hanging from the ceiling, and my windows facing the street, my dad did suggest that I keep my antiqued-black, louvered wooden shutters closed at night. One Christmas, my parents gave me red satin sheets for the bed, but I found that I couldn't keep the pillow on the bed. It kept skittering off the slippery sheets, so they didn't get used much. My bathroom had an antique barrister's bookshelf that had been painted in a distressed hot pink and was utilized as a cabinet for towels, make-up, and the like. If I were to stay in a house that had that room, I suppose I would think it was odd. Like, Madonna Inn-odd (look it up). Then again, I'm not fifteen anymore. At that time, it suited me and my friends just fine.

When I am looking to rent a home from VRBO I always look for three clues to the quality of the home: Appliances (specifically refrigerator and range), bed linens, and master shower. I can live with any decent modern refrigerator, but the range gives me an idea as to the quality of the rest of the house. A Wolf or Viking tells me that the owners didn't cheap out. While it is hard to determine from a photo that the bed linens are not polyester or other non-breathable fabrics of that ilk, you can get some idea of linen quality from how the bed is outfitted. A cheap bedspread will often look like it is just draped upon the bed. A combo bathtub/shower in the master is a no-go. While a fiberglass stall shower isn't ideal, it can still serve purpose, even if plainly ugly. And frankly, these largely non-negotiable quality clues are all just my own. I have friends who don't want to stay in homes with carpeting, or with front-loading washers and dryers, and one who wants overhead lighting -- no lamps! I have found that the homes I rent which owners occupy for their own vacations are generally better. Leather/vinyl or that cheap, fake suede upholstery on the living room sofa will generally indicate that it is not owner-occupied, but that's not a sure thing nor always a deal breaker.

I have twice stayed in rentals where I was miserable. One was in Lake Tahoe when I attended the Intensive Spanish Summer Institute to study Spanish and stayed in a rental home with four other women. It was a dingy tract home. When I asked Robin, the woman who had organized the trip, how she found the rental, she said that she just looked at the online listing and chose the cheapest one! I don't even want to think of how that home was utilized by frat boys during ski season. Another was a rental in Santa Barbara, where I had to wash the duvet cover before I slept in the bed as it was covered with dog hair. Note to self and all: Unless you are comfortable with dander, don't pick a VRBO home that accepts pets.

I have friends who live in fabulous surroundings and it is lovely to spend time with them in their homes. I was introduced to Aireloom mattresses when I spent the night at my friends' home several years ago after a late night at the opera. I now have one in my master and it is heavenly (actually the Heavenly Mattress -- yes, there is such a brand --  got moved to the guest room). Getting the new mattress led me to getting a new bed from a furniture showroom, a heavy, hardwood and headboard-upholstered sleigh bed, which led me to getting room-darkening Hunter-Douglas Duette window-treatments. The room is painted an aegean blue and has a light fixture of candlelight bulbs with a halo of bronze stars. By the way, I still have the red light fixture from the teenaged saloon room. It is in the guest room. But the red velvet rocker is ensconced in the master which is now truly a haven.

I think the Psych Today test pretty much nailed me. Dreariness can affect the way I feel, so for me, it is important to make my surroundings reflect quality, especially when I am traveling. My personal rule of thumb is to never stay in an environment that isn't at least as nice as my home. Travel is enlightening in all kinds of experiential ways, but you are also out of your comfort zone and if the environment is uncomfortably shabby, so will the experience be. It has taken me a lifetime to get to this place but my best take on the subject is to not cheap out on appliances and linens (and medical care, and scotch... I'm just saying). If your core value is aesthetic, attention to the aesthetics is key. You will make your guests, your friends, and, most importantly, yourself happy. And surrounding yourself with happiness that comes from quality and beauty is not just a value, but a truly essential one.