Away We Go

Carmel-by-the-Sea, California

Billy and I are packing up and will leave Carmel tomorrow. Every trip takes on its own sense and flavor. This trip is no different. We haven't spent any September time in Carmel in years, and it is somewhat different than the time we spend in January. First, there's the weather. It was foggy here for the first week. Then the sun came out and stayed out for almost two weeks. Then it got foggy and pretty cold. House guests who were coming out of 90 to 100 degrees at home were pleased. But I brought more long-sleeved tee-shirts than sweaters with me. Still, you make it work. Layers, layers, layers . . .

Second, we spent most of our time here alone. Las Chicas came in for a visit, and so did Sandra and John. But we often stack three or four sets of house guests while we are here. It's a way and time to get together with our friends who live in Northern California. And a good time to get Billy's mom out of Arizona. Except that she was in Washington with Billy's brother. John and Sandra hadn't been to stay with us in Carmel since January 2010, due to Sandra's health issues. And we no longer have Kona Village to reconnoiter each October. So their visit was a given.

We were going to invite other friends who live up in the bay area, but we learned he would be traveling a lot through the month. And, in recent months, she has dropped off on our email communication. I think she isn't currently interested in maintaining a regular dialog. And that's ok. I just wanted to make sure there wasn't something else going on. I gently questioned her about this; asking what was going on as she seemed a bit down. But she didn't respond to the query, and came back with a cheery email, so I let it be. You want to be there for your friends, and especially for the fristers (she is one). But, you can only do something about what you can do something about. I am kind; I stay in contact; I wait. While I have been known to jump in with both feet, sometimes it is better to give friends the time and space they seem to want. Hopefully she will know I am here, when I am needed.

When I talked to Lydia about this, and about the trip, she suggested that Billy and I should not have house guests on the front end of the trip. Billy was here for ten days at the beginning of our stay. He returned twelve days later and stayed until the end (ten more days). I talked to him about Lydia's advice. She thinks we need this, I said. Billy agreed with Lydia. So we went short on house guests and spent our first ten nights here all by our lonesome. It was better. It was something we needed after the strain of recent hectic and stressful years. We walked; went out for drinks and/or dinner; drove the 17-Mile Drive (yet again); relaxed and slept well. Batteries were running low on juice, but we didn't know how to recharge them. Lydia did.

And so we go. It's always hard to leave, but, perhaps easier this time, as we will be returning in late December. Billy worked straight through from late January to September 1st without a break or vacation besides Fourth of July. It was too long. Having the two one-week periods off this September was good for him. But not enough. We both know that next year he will take a few more shorter breaks, and we plan to recreate a bit more. We are getting older, and all work seems harder to do. Billy wants to work another five years, but I hope to shorten that (financial wizard that I am) by at least a year.

I return to Los Angeles to attend a Dodgers game with my frister, Lydia, the next evening. It will be the second to the last game of the season, and the Dodgers hang on by a very slender thread to the possibility of a wild card spot. I have to accept that for Dodgers baseball, the season is most likely ending. Dodgers baseball became a true respite over the past six months, even when they were nose-diving. I've learned to love baseball again, and I've been grateful for the distraction. But, its season is coming to a close with no other sport to replace it for me. Football, ugh. Basketball? Lakers are getting pretty long in the tooth, and it's so frantic. I think I will just need to hang on until April. After all, next year is a new, clean page yet to be writ. And people have invested over a billion dollars in this team! Which is crazy. But. Let's go, Dodgers in 2013.

And so, home. But again, Carmel feels more and more like home, so I get confused. Better to say that we will be returning to Los Angeles, where everyday life including our business and gardening chores await. Oh, and we will be having a new roof put on our house. That's what you do in between trips to Carmel. You take care of business. Carmel will be here, and I will think of it in the way I always thought about the Kona Village when we weren't there. Daily life goes on whether you are there or not. You just can't see it. It's like Brigadoon. Only without that 100-yearlong siesta. Wake up, and thank you for reading my blog. See you soon in Los Angeles!

On The Road Again

Carmel-by-the-Sea, California

This will be our seventh January spent at the same rental house in Carmel. And, the answer to the question: do I know how lucky I am? is yes, I do. Although sometimes, even in the midst of your luck, you have to pay for your pretties.

Billy and I left our home in the northern end of Los Angeles at 3:45 on Sunday, January 2nd, en route to spend dinner and the night with our friends who live in Santa Barbara. Now, we live close enough to Santa Barbara that we have often spent a Sunday gardening, then showered, dressed, and climbed into the car to drive to Santa Barbara for dinner. After a day of digging around in the dirt, Brophy Brothers used to be our go-to spot until we had a couple of off-experiences there. Anyway, with all of that aside, we were counting on a seventy to ninety minute drive to our friends' home. Our travel time was generously estimated, or so we thought. It was, after all, the Sunday after a long New Year's weekend which included both the Rose Parade and Bowl game both held in the greater Los Angeles basin. So, in light of that, we conservatively tacked on about twenty minutes to our usual ETA.

Twenty minutes? LOL! Again, we left home at 3:45 with an expected arrival of 5:00-ish. Instead, we arrived at 8:15 pm after four and one-half hours traveling the seventy miles north on Highway 101. Now, I need to underscore that we did not take this experience personally. My friend and pilates trainer, Cathy, was stuck in New York for almost a week just after Christmas. And we heard a horror story or two about people basically camping at Heathrow in a similar nightmare. So, with all of that, as well as our ultimate destination in mind, we sucked it up and tried to make the best of our ten-mph commute at the commencement of our month away from home. We listened to a 2-CD set called Ultimate Broadway. It began with Oklahoma. By the time we made it all the way to Rent, I would have paid rent on a restroom for just a few moments' use. All along the highway, men had no such issue as they pulled over to use the side of the road. After the show tunes, we went to salsa music on my iPod, and finally ended up listening to The Rolling Stones, wishing we had some of Keith Richards' substances to abuse.

But it did will out, and we made it to Santa Barbara, to our friends' lovely home. While we were stuck on the road and after we let them know of our situation, Gwen phoned us frequently to check on our progress. She was making a risotto, so there was no problem holding dinner -- it would be made after we arrived. Henry told us that the wine was set out waiting for us, and we confessed that vodka would be our beverage of choice after this ordeal. Eventually, we arrived. Bathroom: done. Vodka: check. A good dinner, and our January retreat had begun.

We left Santa Barbara the next morning, and arrived in Carmel late Monday afternoon after the rain had swept south through central and southern California. We caught the sunset at Carmel beach. We celebrated our first night, as we always have, at Rio Grill. We are now unpacked, and our larder is stocked. And, we are in Carmel, which in many ways feels like we are home. I never anticipate this feeling when we are in the throes of removing holiday decorations, and packing up what always feels like much too much, before making this trip. In recent years, I find myself increasingly burned-out during that transition, and I often feel that I am sorry we have made these plans. But we push through the pre-trip travails, then travel up the 101 which approximates what was once, in the old mission days, called the Camino Real. We cut in at Salinas towards the Monterey area, and as we approach Highway 1, I finally see a stand of cypress trees. Not all, but a lot of my accumulated stress diminishes in one heavy exhale. Le sigh . . .

And so, from my kitchen table/desk in the little house that we rent here, and at the end of our first full day in Carmel-by-the-Sea, I start my year, by wishing you a happy new year. May it be a year without gridlock. A year without grief. A year to remember for all the beauty and cypress trees it may, perchance, bring to us. Welcome to 2011, and, thank you for reading my blog.